Ben Won!!

Thanks for your votes!

http://www.sunjournal.com/city/story/916495

Local dad named 2010 Best Dad on Wheels

By Andie Hannon, Staff Writer

AUBURN — The Christopher and Dana Reeve Foundation announced Monday that a local 32-year-old father was named 2010 Best Dad on Wheels.

Ben Hayes said he was humbled Monday morning when he received the call from the foundation telling him that his story received more votes than any other. Paralyzed in an accident in late 2007, the Auburn man credits his large support team, which includes his wife, family, friends and co-workers, with helping reach goals many in his position would have given up on.

"I worked hard to get to this point," Hayes said Monday night. "I'm humbled that people recognize me for not being willing to give up and wanting to find ways to connect with my family and connect with (daughter) Isabel."

The nonprofit organization named after the late Superman actor sponsors the contest each year to honor those living with paralysis who demonstrate dedication, love, encouragement and goodwill.

Dedicated to curing spinal cord injury by funding innovative research and improving the quality of life for people living with paralysis through grants, information and advocacy, the Reeve Foundation invited the public to vote on its top 10 entries. Nominated by his college-sweetheart-turned-wife, Erin, Hayes received more than 8,000 votes to nab the grand prize, which includes bragging rights for the next year and a $500 gift package from Vineyard Vines Clothing.

"The ability to keep everything in perspective is the key," Hayes said in statement issued by the foundation. "Keep pushing and never let it stop you."

According to the foundation, Hayes embodies the spirit and courage of the contest because he doesn't allow the spinal cord injury to stop him from being an active father in the life of his daughter, Isabel, who was only 4 months old at the time of his accident.

"Ben and our other terrific nominees show that while paralysis limits the body, it doesn't limit the heart and mind's capacity to parent," the foundation said in a statement.

Hayes doesn't allow his wheelchair to stop him from doing all the things with his family that other husbands and dads do. He eats with his daughter, transports her around and tucks her in each night with bedtime stories. One thing that stands out is that he teaches his daughter that being in a wheelchair doesn't stop him from loving and guiding her as she grows.

"I try to tell people to be optimistic and try to keep things in perspective in terms of what they're trying to accomplish," Hayes said.

VOTE FOR BEN HAYES!!!

Benjamin with his daughter

Benjamin Hayes

My husband, Ben, suffered a C4/C5 spinal cord injury on December 21st, 2007. Our daughter, Isabel, was 4 1/2 months old at the time. Ben has developed a loving relationship with Isabel.

He does everything in his power to connect with her and make her realize that even though daddy cannot move, he still loves her and can play with her every day. He uses what he has gained to "hug" her. He had her in front of him while he worked out and let her crawl on him like he was her jungle gym. They "swing" in his lift and once Ben could move his arm, she would hold his hand even though he couldn't hold hers. They eat together (see photo) and at night he tells her stories.

He does everything he can with her and teaches her every single day that daddy is no different than anyone else. He just needs a chair. The older she gets, the more questions she asks. Ben calmly answers them all in a way that she can understand. She knows about daddy's injury and she knows, just as she said, that one day daddy will get up and walk.

http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.ddJFKRNoFiG/b.6234103/k.2BE/Vote_for_the_Best_Dad_on_Wheels.htm?msource=email&auid=6976201

Vote for the Best Dad on Wheels - Christopher and Dana Reeve Foundation

www.christopherreeve.org

YOU decide who the 2010 Best Dad on Wheels will be! Read each entry then vote for the your favorite one! The Christopher and Dana Reeve Foundation is dedicated to curing spinal cord injury by funding innovative research, and improving the quality of life for people living with paralysis.

final touches

More Eric's Cabin Pics

Progress Report

The Healing Garden/Eric's Cabin continues to come together. 98 trees and shrubs planted last week and Chuck is working on constructing the bridge across the dry rock creek bed. The dedication date is now set for September 29th. Something special...

Eric's Cabin Update

The Cabin is just a thing of beauty. Work continues on the paths and the plantings. Dedication is Sept 27th.

Want to support the effort? Go to http://www.hvwa.blogspot.com/ and scroll down the left hand side.

This piece ran in the local paper recently. Go to Page 4... http://www.rem1.org/local_voices/images/2010b/summer_2010_local_voices.pdf

Thank you.

"Waterville Waver"

His name is Don and he has been walking up and down Main Street for decades, smiling and waving at every passing car. When traffic is heavy, he uses both hands so as to not miss anyone, a constant, complicated ballet of motion.

His wave is complex, begins as an outstretched arm, then a twist at the wrist and elbow, ending with the palm facing backwards, again with arm outstretched, thumb and one finger extended, the other three partially curled. He has perfected the movement over decades.

20 years ago, he began wearing wristbands and the "urban legend" in Waterville spread that he was suffering from carpal tunnel syndrome from the repeated movement. Not so, he claims. They are to protect his wrists from contact during his practice of Hung Gar, a form of Chinese Kung Fu. His one inch long thumb nails are also a part of his practice.

"It's what I do," he replied when asked why he waves. "I can't explain it better, because my mind doesn't work good anymore. I started doing it when I worked for my Uncle's catering company back in the 50's and I just kept on doing it." I asked, "How old are you, Don?" "You got me with that one. My mind doesn't work good anymore. I'm not good with numbers and dates," he replied smiling.

The smile never left his lips. Thin, fit, balding, he is of average height and stands erect as he speaks with me and waves at each passing car. His teeth are pointed and it has been a very long time since he has seen a dentist. He dresses in dirty jeans and a tee shirt with a large eagle belt buckle. In his breast pocket he carries a Mega Bucks ticket. "Do you ever win the lottery," I asked. "Yeah, sometimes," he replied, removing the ticket and displaying three one dollar bills. "It's what you do with the 'ones'."

"I'll be 80 in a month... a couple months," he suddenly recalls. I replied, "Wow, Don, you're in good shape for 80. And I noticed your long thumbnails." He responded with a long, fluid martial arts movement which ended with both his arms outstretched and the thumbnails pointed about 3 inches from my eyeballs. "Hung Gar. It's the Hung Gar. Nobody knows it. It's not here. It's everywhere else, but not here." "Martial arts?" I asked. He nodded. "I can't explain, because, like I said, my mind doesn't work good anymore."

Out of the blue, Don offered, "It's the macular degeneration..." I asked, "Are your eyes bad? That must be tough walking in traffic." He said, "I can't see your face right now, but I walk in the road, especially with a lot of snow. It's safe, because everyone knows me. The cars move for me. I don't move for them. It's what I do."

The whiskers on his chin are sparse, white, 3 inches long. "Are you happy?" I asked. "Oh yeah, I'm happy." "Do you know John, the Jesus Man, who also walks around Waterville?" I asked. "Oh yeah, we're friends. He's a good guy." "Can I take your picture?" I asked. "Oh yeah, I'm not shy."

A car horn beeped at him, and, without breaking eye contact with me, he executed his complex, twisting wave. "I can't explain it, because, like I said, my mind doesn't work good anymore." he smiled.

As he walked away, I called after him. "You're like that guy Kane on the Kung Fu TV show, just walking the earth, enjoying your days." He looked back over his shoulder, smiled and gave me his wave.





j

On my honor...

Headline...

Obama Missing Historic Boy Scout Jamboree for Fundraisers, 'View' Taping

"President Obama will make history as the first sitting president on a daytime talk show when he visits with the ladies of "The View." But he'll be missing out on another historic occasion -- the Boy Scouts' Jamboree marking the group's 100th anniversary, right in the president's backyard."

OK, that tears it. I concur with the "Jesus Man".

Full Circle

After a very busy couple of months filled with happy events: weddings, rehearsal dinners, bachelor parties and showers; after traveling to Cape Cod, and Manassas, Long Pong and Cincinnati, Portland and Bangor, we have arrived where we began 3 years ago... Waterville. It seems like a logical and convenient place to just "be" for a month or two. Close to Tina in Bangor. Close to the kids in Portland. Close to family and old friends, dentist, doctors, vets... So we have rented a little place just down the street from the Hospice House for a while. Nice long, pillared front porch where we placed some white wicker rockers from the storage unit up the road. Great for reading and visiting... and the dogs love it, too.


Work on the Hospice Healing Garden continues and we are glad to be close to participate with the building of "Eric's cabin" and the planting. This week trees are being planted and walking paths are being roughed in.

It is odd being back here where we spent so many years... 31 years, raising our family, working careers, mowing lawns, shoveling snow. So many memories.

Speaking of "odd", I rode my bicycle down on Main Street this morning and spent an hour talking to John Lewis, a local, longstanding oddity. For the last decade or more, I had watched him walking the streets of Waterville with a homemade cross in one hand, wearing a red mackinaw wool cap, summer and winter. Snowmobile suit in winter, shorts and tee shirt in summer, he wears a small backpack, chartreuse earphones and wrap around sunglasses and blesses cars and pedestrians as they pass by. Anyone from Waterville would recognize the "Jesus Man" and, though I had not thought of him for 3 years, I was not surprised to see him walking down Elm Street in front of the library.

One of the blessings of being "unplugged" is the gift of time. Perhaps, in the past, I was too busy or too self important to take time to speak with this unique individual, but today was different. Or maybe I am different... not necessarily better... just different.

John is almost 70 years old. A native son, he attended Waterville High School through the 10th grade and worked for 30 years at the Wyandotte Woolen Mill in the carding department. Hot, brutal, menial factory work. Difficult work according to John. Difficult people, he emphasized. He spoke of his loving mother who "went with Jesus" years ago. The churches turned him out, were not interested in his evangelizing and prophesying of the impending Armageddon. "Churches only want your money. Yahweh will not be pleased with them on the Judgment Day." he lisped passionately.

"They" tell him who is good and who is from "the dark side". People, houses, vehicles, he claims he can sense whether they are of God or the devil. "You will know them by their works" he quoted. "Obama is the anti-Christ" he rasped. Nancy Pelosi also made the list of the damned, spawn of Satan.

At some point, he was institutionalized; "Locked me up for crazy until I learned to keep my mouth shut", he offered furtively. I told him I had seen him at the cemetery before. "50 years ago, as I walked up the steps to the large cross, the gates of heaven opened to me. It was so beautiful!" and he started to weep. "But them I was shown the gates of hell. It scared me so much. I almost went insane." So for the next 50 years he kept his vigil at that cross until he was "purified" and now he "marches for Jesus" on the streets of Waterville blessing everything and anything that comes his way.

He gave me his blessing as we parted, waved his cross over my head and warned me to be ready, to be among the chosen, when Jesus comes to save the faithful from the wrath of a vengeful God. And it will be soon... 2012 he stated with conviction.



The "Jesus Man" walked slowly across Main street waving his cross at buildings, dogs, passing ambulances and telephone poles happily living his own reality on the streets of Waterville. Nice to finally meet him. As the country song goes "These are my people..."

Mr. & Mrs. Chris and Molly Ahlman

Congratulations family! Wonderful wedding. Beautiful bride.

Mr. & Mrs. Foss

Happy days!

Congratulations Nate and Britt

A beautiful wedding on Cape Cod. A beautiful bride, a handsome groom, a wonderful reception with lots of friends and family. And some hands on time with the newest member of the family, little Ava. Life is very good.

Happy 80th Aunt Chris

Happy Times!

Eric's Cabin

The timing of being back in Maine for Ryan's wedding and back in Waterville for a month could not have been better. It gave us the opportunity to lay some blood, sweat and tears on a new structure built behind the Waterville Hospice House, an organization in which we have been active for the past 10 years.

The Hospice Memorial Healing Garden was only an idea when I joined the board in 2001. But it was an idea that excited a lot of people. Richie Houghton, Eric's best friend, was studying landscape architecture at UMass at the time and he developed a plan and a model of the garden to be located on a piece of land behind the Hospice House... which we did not own, nor for which we had the money to buy. Talk about a dream.

Over the years, Dale Clark and her wonderful volunteers raised money, bought the land, and cleared and improved the property. Richie, now a licensed professional landscape architect in Boston, put together a fabulous, updated plan which called for a special, central structure in the healing garden. And the extraordinary Chuck Lakin prepared the plans and the materials for that structure. The structure is unique and impressive, the most outstanding features being the curved, laminated roof trusses, covered with tongue and groove Russian Spruce, stained with Australian Oil.

The building is called "Eric's Cabin" in memory of our son. That is a story that began years ago and a link to which is pasted here http://gdfoss.blogspot.com/2008/12/december-8th.html .

I love the way the Universe works. Everything begins with Intention. Add time and space and patience and persistence. Keep flexible. Keep faithful. Pay attention. Things never turn out as you had hoped for. They turn out so much better.

Busy Back in Maine

Triplets in the Neighborhood

Our little condo is on the corner of a lane leading directly onto the beach and we enjoy watching the steady stream of walkers, dogs on leashes, bikers, golf carts, runners... The dogs stand on the back of the couch and watch through the picture window. Always something going on. Today's triplets take the prize for "Cuteness".

The String Rays played at Palm Coast Coffee House last night and we enjoyed hanging with the SSI Village crew. From left to right: Mimi, Rosemary, Connie, Jay, Shelly... good looking bunch!

Getting geared up to hit the road and work our way North for a busy summer of weddings, showers, anniversary and bachelor parties. Gonna miss the slow and easy congenial pace of southern living, but then, everything changes. If we have learned anything, it's that life is best lived going with the flow...

Declan

Declan died last week. Laima and Robert have always been dog people, but this one was pretty special. A noble beast who welcomed, or at least did not devour, Sam and Lu when we visited them in New Mexico in 2008... even when they drank out of his water dish. So sorry friends

Blogus Interuptus

Time for a new computer. The level of my frustration has finally exceeded the heights of my frugality, both of which are Everest-like in stature. And perhaps also time to purchase access to the internet instead of relying on stray, unprotected wireless networks that come and go with the Georgia tides.

But for today I suppose blogging in this Palm Coast coffee shop is adequate. Happy New Year Ya'll.

Another December 8th

always

Have Massage Table, Will Travel.

I think it was in December 2004 that I bought Connie a massage table as a Christmas gift. I spent my lunch hours at Barnes and Noble reading books like "Massage for Dummies". At any rate, she loved the gift and so did Ryan and Kate. It is a gift that keeps on giving.

None the less, I was surprised when Connie insisted on taking the massage table along when we headed out on our cross country adventure in 2007. We figured out a way to secure it on top of a cot in the back of the van and it was actually a very comfortable place to relax as we explored this magnificent country.

I can't count the number of times over the past 2 1/2 years that I have dragged it out of the van to rub out Connie's sore back after a long day of sitting in those car seats. And she slept on it (with the legs folded down) instead of an air mattress in the tent as we camped in the National Parks across the West.

Last spring we were camped at Calf Creek in Southern Utah, an area called Escalante and we had just come back from a 5 mile hike through the desert canyonlands. The scenery was so spectacular, especially the 230 foot waterfall at the back of the canyon, but the hiking was in soft sand, like beach sand, and our legs were very sore. It was 90 degrees. When we got back to our campsite, Connie plopped down at the picnic table and promptly lost her balance and toppled over landing on the ground on her back and on top of Sampson.

They both started to howl in pain. After a few minutes, things began to quiet down, but Connie was still down on the ground when a male voice came out of the darkness.

"Everything OK over there?" he asked.

"My wife took a tumble," I responded.

The shadowy figure moved closer to the campfire and said "Is she alright?"

I replied," Her back is pretty sore..."

A 50ish, fit man dressed in hiking clothes walked into the light and smiled "Maybe I can help. I just happen to be a chiropractor."

I said,"Well, that's just great! I just happen to have a massage table!"

We set up the table and an hour later Connie felt much better. We spent time over the next few days hiking and talking with Martin and his wife, Billy, from Bozeman Montana. Great folks.

Fast forward through the summer of 2009 where the massage table stayed set up in the middle of Ryan's and Katie's apartments used by anyone and everyone with sore muscles and aching backs. Ryan and Kristen, Landace, Katie, Connie. I even got a little massage for my sore muscles from the long days working on the docks. Fast forward to Saint Simons Island where Connie and I have settled in for a few months enjoying the milder weather, the beach and the laid back low-country life.

We have rented a small. newly appointed two bedroom condo, 100 yards from the beach. It is one of 3 connected units, a triplex, and, like so many properties on the island, there is a For Sale sign out front. We unpacked the Thule, set up the massage table and are just enjoying being hunkered down for a time. It was a busy summer and we are catching up on our rest, reading and correspondence, just relaxing for a bit. We are also watching what we eat and drink, working on staying healthy, taking off a few pounds (they certainly come off harder than they went on...). We even joined the Saint Simons Island Health Club.

It's a great facility; swimming pool. gym, lots of aerobic equipment, weight machines and exercise classes from pilates to yoga. And, so like kids in a candy store, we overdid it in the first week. My tennis elbow started acting up from the curls and Connie's knee got swollen and sore from the treadmill and pilates classes. We went on line and read about conservative treatments, icing, ibuprofen, elastic support braces and so got busy getting better.

Connie was at CVS picking up a knee brace when there came a knock at the door. The man wearing a Western wide brimmed hat said he was from North Carolina and that his name was Dave. He wanted information about the property for sale. Connie walked through the door as I finished providing him contact info and she sat down and started to put on the knee brace.

Dave said "You're knee is swollen. I think I can help you."

Connie said, "Really?"

He said" Yes. I happen to be a chiropractor."

I said "Well that's just Great! I happen to have a massage table."


Now you tell me... Are these random or non-random events? Is something going on or isn't it? Regardless, makes for a cute story...

As they say here in Coastal Georgia "Anyway...."